Do you want to know why sleep training is actually positive and sometimes even vital?
Some people say, “Moms shouldn’t worry about their little one’s sleep” and “just to let it sort itself out”. They think they’re taking the pressure off these moms, but they’re actually putting unreasonable pressure on some parents who really need help and support.
You wouldn’t tell someone with mental illness, stress, or depression to just chill because it will sort itself out. No, you would encourage them to get the support they need. Well, it’s the same with sleep, and many of these moms are suffering from stress and depression, which often goes away once they’re getting healthy sleep.
So there is this idea that you don’t need to get help, you can just do what comes naturally and that all little ones go through those phases and they grow out of it and it will get better so you can just relax. Well, okay, if that has worked for you, then amazing. You’re so lucky, but I think it’s irresponsible and actually destructive to try to push that as a view for all.
It’s not the right view for everybody to take, and there are people out there who are in such a terrible state because of the sleep deprivation that they’re going through. Often because their little one isn’t getting the sleep that they need. So suggestions that sleep training isn’t necessary or that sleep training is in some way a bad thing, or that it can have negative effects on little ones later in life, are not true. These suggestions aren’t scientifically backed up. It’s just nonsense based on very old fashioned methods, which no sleep consultant in this day and age would recommend.
It’s just fear talking, and it’s unhelpful and also dangerous to push that opinion as one that should be taken by all parents or all moms. And like I said, it’s usually done in a well-meaning way. People say these things because they just want you to feel better and they just want to take the pressure off and they want to say, “Hey, it’ll be okay.”
But what if it’s not okay? What if that family is one sleepless night away from a serious health problem or a car crash that wipes them all out? You want to be that person to tell them that, “It’s okay, it’ll get better. Don’t worry.” And then that happens? It’s not fair to do that.
There is healthy, reliable, scientifically-backed help to overcome challenges with little one’s sleep. And no, it doesn’t mean leaving your child to cry it out. That’s not training. That’s just ignorance. And if you want to actually kindly and lovingly support your child to get better at anything in this life, it needs a proactive approach; not to passively sit back.
Would you passively sit back and just hope your child figures out how to read? No, you’d get them books. You’d read to them. You’d send them to school. You’d do all the things that help them learn how to read.
Do you just take a toddler’s nappy or diaper off and just expect them to figure out how to use the bathroom? No, you help them. You guide them. You encourage them. You show them the way, lovingly supporting them as they develop essential life skills. And it’s absolutely the same with sleep.
Some lucky people don’t face any challenges. Why? Because it just so happens that the routine or the rhythm they get into happens to suit that child’s personality. It just works. But that’s the lucky few, and some people with more than one child don’t get that lucky twice.
I remember a mom, a client of mine who had five children. She had no challenges with the first four and found sleep came easy. So, of course, when number five came along and he wasn’t sleeping properly and they were all exhausted, she couldn’t understand why.
She said, “I’ve done this four times before, what am I doing so wrong this time?” And we looked at the situation and I told her, I reassured her, “You’re not doing anything wrong, but your approach that’s worked really brilliantly for your other four children isn’t right for this little one. This is his situation. This is his personality. This is his environment. It’s not the same, and he needs a different approach.”
Within three nights, we had this toddler going from needing to fall asleep with his dad or his sister on a sofa, watching TV, to saying night-night to his family and going happily to bed. The little kid needed sleep. He wanted to sleep. He just didn’t know how. And at no point was this child left to cry or expected to figure it out by himself. He was shown. He was guided. He was supported. He was encouraged. It was all so lovingly resolved.
So I really want to share this message of encouragement for people who are struggling. Even if it’s not that bad yet, you don’t need to wait till it’s that seriously worrying.
Don’t wait till you almost have a car crash. Don’t wait until your health is severely on the line. Don’t wait until your child has had the impact of poor sleep affect their cognitive development, which you can’t even see right now. Because when your child is around age six or seven, the effects start to show at school, in their work, in their social circles because they weren’t sleeping so well when they were a toddler. Don’t wait for that to happen.
Put your hand up and say, “Yes, I need some help with this.” Because it’s not common knowledge. It’s not easy. It’s a really complex topic, and it’s one that we know how to solve. And we have a proven system to do that and we’ll help you.
Every individual family is unique. We’ll guide you to those answers. If you’re somebody that needs help, don’t delay, take action. We have so many free resources, as well as bespoke plans.
So click the link I’ve shared with you and get started today.